Future

Life is just so out of control. I hate it. I hate it I just hate it. Sometimes I just feel that I could kill myself. What the hell is happening to this life of mine? Where is my future?! What am I doing now, at the age of 21??????
I-J-U-S-T-H-A-T-E-M-Y-L-I-F-E
I hate it when i dun see myself clearly. I hate it that the realistic is so clear, reflecting on my life, I hate it when I am forced to face with it. I hate myself for being not brave enough to go away from all this. And I hate my personality. I hate my look. I hate my character. I hate myself.
Why am I going through all this fucking hell?
And this is just me. I have no more future. I can't see it anymore. I can't see myself as what I want to be, as what I expect my life would be, and how my future is .

I can just see the repetition of life again. My mom's life on me. This is just what I do not want it to happen.
I loathe myself.

Michelle...

Yesterday was fun! I chatted with michelle a.k.a chelle chelle on msn yesterday.. I missed her so much.. we chatted about recently stuffs.. I missed her so much.. I missed law so much.. all abt ELS, tort and contract law.. i just love language.. i love the way Ananth teach, i love the way he teach us as in like a story book...
Well, I can't deny that i miss KL.. I missed the fast pace in KL.. I am so tired in JB.. everything.. I am tired of working, tired of bringing up the kid in my life, tired of teaching "it"..
Well well well.. Let us just see what will happen in the life after end of this year to see is there any changes.. I dunno, I wanted a change, but I am considering a lot of things... Let just see how things go on ..

indian chief

this stupid bitch! old bitch! she think what she is the sales controller so how! no need to die is it..
keep showing of her position keep scolding people especially when new people come in! she want to attack other people attack la! Y me! this time is my mistake that is why i did not answer u back! No more next time! I swear next time you wil kena from me kao kao! Madhu bhandahari!

anyway, no wonder they always say indian chief indian chief.. indians are always fighting to be chiefs.. so stupid..

Kampar Perak

Its time to update my blog now... since I have been MIA..although i think nobody is following it..hahazz..for the fun of it..

I have dyed my hair last sunday, since the pimple man is not around and most of the people are not free.. it is so bright now and i will post the picture on the next post.. I am so not used to it and i think it does not suits me so well.. cuz i am dark and my hair is so ah lian.. this is the consequences for being so cheapo..anyway it cost only RM140 puls highlighting..at JS in bertam taman daya..
I

I have dabao for the second day now to work for breakfast..bread and cheese and nutella.. save save save is my motive now!! RM10000 is my target!!

Congrats to Lai Hui ying for her birthday.. (i dun think she will come here to read anyway since everybody thought i have abandoned this blog) and coming soon is elsie and ting ting's birthday.. I remember one..

My yee ma called today to ask me to apply for scholarship in UTAR.. which actually i DUN WAN to to so.. but i feel bad towards her.. so i applied lorh.. if i got it den shit is coming on the way cuz IDUN WANNA GO KAMPAR PERAK!! It is so ULU!!